Friday, August 24, 2012

collide

This bipolar shit is crippling. There's no handicapp parking pass for the emotionally unstable. Though if you think about it, we are the unpredictable folks that can lose it at any second, and you just never know if a frustrating lot/garage/street will be the one thing that sends us right over the edge and into a psychotic break. .... Ive been feeling really intense lately, and today is the apex. A minute ago I found myself crying from an internal pain so deeply rooted in my psyche that it knows no way out. Ive high doubts it will ever see the light of day, take a gasp of fresh air, escape. No. It sits in my marrow, filling my bones with traumatic memories that seep into my bloodstream, rushing to my brain for their electrocution, where the sparks explode, burning, searing, leaving scars around the grey matter. An insult to the bloody tissue. And yes, I know I have to change. But I am an emotional glacier, icy cold and slow-moving.
i painted my nails 'plaza burgandy'. you know, to match my mood.
current mood: whose blood is this current music: bon iver - flume current obsession: stomach fat

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